2010
by Nanaki BH
Summary: It was easy to understand why she left. It was hard to understand why it hurt so much. - 1925-inspired, kind of odd. Has BL overtones.


**Disclaimer:** _Vocaloid _and all related characters are property of Yamaha and their respective owners.  
**Notes:** This goes along with 11. "broken spirits" in the 500themes challenge. Mostly, I just wanted to make something that was based on _1925 _(originally sung by Miku). Nobody seems to know exactly what the song is about, if youtube comments are any sign, but I'm pretty sure it's talking about this sort of feeling.

2010  
By: Nanaki BH

He forgot to get off at the last stop. At this rate, he was going to have to wait for the train to go all the way back around before he'd ever make it back home. He kept sparing glances at the charm in his palm and looking out the window and pointedly avoiding all eye contact with the people around him. Especially him.

Standing in front of him, hanging onto the handrail above, was the lavender-haired annoyance that called himself his best friend. Kaito couldn't remember giving him the honor of such a thing. As far as he was concerned, Gakupo was just an annoyance that followed him from class to class and tried to hit on him in front of his girlfriend. And now he'd gotten himself sandwiched in between two old men because he was late to the platform and had to fight to find a spot on the train.

He'd probably give him sympathy if he knew. Or he'd be excited. The thought made Kaito's stomach feel sick and he tried not to think about him anymore.

The train swayed abruptly and the charm fell out of his hand onto the floor. Quickly, he swiped it back up but it didn't go without notice.

"That's hers, isn't it?" His voice sounded hurt, like he had any right to be.

"I was the one who gave it to her." He didn't need to be indulging him with any such information.

"Oh, I see. So she gave it back?"

He clenched his fist around it until the pointed edge of the tiny heart dug into his palm. Biting his lip, he reared back his hand and threw the thing on him just to get it away. It was starting to sting anyway and he didn't have any reason to hold onto such a girly thing.

It hit Gakupo's chest and fell to the ground. Briefly, he eyed the handrail, but let go to lean down and pick it up. "Want me to hold onto it?" he asked.

"Whatever."

He wasn't going to look at him or pay attention to him now anyway. Didn't matter if he took the thing. That would be two things off his mind that way and he could go back to peacefully looking out the window at the buildings that passed them by. What was he going to do about getting home anyway? How long did it take for the train to go all the way back around? Couldn't he just wait at the next station for a train going in the opposite direction? They must all hit the same stops, right? In all this time he'd been going from home to school, from school back home, why hadn't he ever bothered to learn more about the rails?

"What happened?"

"We had sex."

That shut him up. He looked at him only long enough to catch the instantly grave look it put on his face. He probably also gave the perverts around them some nice food for thought to chew on until they got off the train as well.

He pulled out his phone, checked his mails. Nothing from her. No apologies, nothing from anyone else either. He didn't have many people in his contacts anyway, so it wasn't that odd. Just that maybe there'd be... _something _else. It was just sort of cruel to realize that she didn't care beyond giving him a few words at the end of the day.

At least it explained why she'd been ignoring him. At least it wasn't because of him. There wasn't anything wrong with him. There wasn't anything very interesting at all about him. There wasn't anything interesting about anyone. It was just how things were. No one was 'made for each other', not even them.

"It was her, right?" Why did he insist on talking still? "Not to be rude or anything, but I always had the feeling she was the type who was just using you."

"I don't think so."

That wasn't how it was. Just, he wasn't any different from any other guy, really, so why not? At least she was smart enough to realize they all must be interchangeable.

"In any case, I'm right. You shouldn't be so broken up about it. There are better people out there, I'm sure."

"I don't see why you're so concerned." He put his cheek in his palm and kept a steadfast eye on the billboards that passed them by faster than he could process what they said. He admired the graffiti on a few of them and tried to catch the amount on the sign for the lottery.

"You know I like you."

The old guys next to him groaned, like he was shattering all their fantasies about having sex with high school girls. The one visibly huffed and turned away like he was expecting this to turn into a drama and that made Kaito laugh and he let Gakupo just believe he was laughing at whatever he wanted to believe he was laughing at. He didn't fucking _care_ anymore. This was just so ridiculous now.

"I tried not to be a bother to you. Especially when she was around." Kaito laughed at him this time because he knew that one was a lie. "But if you don't give me a serious answer sometime, you're going to lose me too, you realize."

Kaito straightened his tie and ran a hand down over his hair once, twice to make sure it was all in the right place and then turned around to face him. He kept his elbows on his thighs, his hands hanging limply between his legs, and looked up at him through the fringe of his bangs. That guy that turned away before was looking back at him now, just to see what he was going to say. Might as well make it good.

"Go out with me then."

"Really?"

The young woman sitting to his left suddenly looked about as interested to know as Gakupo did. He looked at her directly and she whipped her head back around and pretended not to be paying attention. Gakupo's forehead creased, like he was taking this so very seriously and Kaito just... shrugged.

"I gave you that already, didn't I?" he asked, pointing to the chain that hung from the charm Gakupo held in his fist. "Put it on then."

His long fingers caressed the thin gold chain with more affection than Kaito thought necessary and then he lifted it up to his neck and closed the clasp behind him. That sealed things then. He looked a lot more pleased than Kaito thought necessary, too. In the world of "you lose some, you win some" this was not what he thought he'd win.

This wasn't going to make things easier for him at all. Not that he cared. She wasn't a part of this anymore. That puzzle piece had been dropped into another box and his was going to look just as nice next to Gakupo's. She knew more than anyone else that he could look just as good standing next to anyone else as well. It wasn't any matter that he was a guy.

He sort of owed it to Gakupo anyway. He'd be lying if he said he didn't feel bad about ignoring him like that for so long anyway. He had an answer for him, after all. He just thought that you couldn't always give the answer you want to give when you want to give it. She made it kind of obvious that you don't have to wait, though. If something better comes along, you should just take it.

"You're pretty broken up about it, huh?"

He hadn't realized that he was sitting next to him until he heard him. The woman next to him had politely moved over to allow him room to fit and now their thighs were pressed snugly together. Everyone on one of these trains were close together to start with and now they were just closer. It didn't make any difference, except that Gakupo's breath was on his ear, warming them up. They were probably red. It was the cold, the cold. The train was really cold.

Gakupo took his hand and he squeezed it back gratefully.

"I'm not," he said. He wasn't. "I don't care. I just... probably gave her more than she deserved. She doesn't care at all, though. I'm sure she's off happily doing whatever with her new boyfriend now."

"She's going to feel really stupid for leaving you eventually, though."

"Why's that?" He inclined his head toward him and Gakupo looked him in the eyes.

"Because if I were her, I'd feel pretty stupid."

That was what people call a 'line to steal your heart', right? That's what it sounded like. And what it felt like. His heart did that clenching kind of thing in his chest and his lip quivered and when he blinked was when he realized that his eyes had been wet. He steadied his breath with a shaking one.

This wasn't fair at all. She didn't play fair. Neither did he. But that's just how things are.

Gakupo leaned into the fractional space that divided them and lightly touched his lips to the spot just under his eye, high on his cheek.

"Want to go find a place to get ice cream together at the next stop?"

"You get off there?" Why was he crying now anyway? That wasn't attractive at all. People would notice.

"No," he said, laughing as he brushed his lips through the trail of tears that slid down his cheek. He took Kaito's hand in his other one so he could slide the closer one around his waist. "I passed my stop a long time ago."

They took the next stop for ice cream.


End file.
